Whats on my mind.

I have a lot of things on my mind, and I guess I should post them on here because I have a higher chance of having somebody to talk to about it with that actually cares.

Well let's start out with family, more specifically my moms family.
My uncle, he's the one with all the cats, might have pancreatic cancer. It's treatable so that portion is okay. Long story short, my family is going to have to help him. The thing is, I can't go near him, let alone his house or else I'll be hospitalized. He smokes and has cats. That leaves one sick ginger.
So basically my mom is now worried about whats going to happen, because if you know anything about my mom, you know why.

Next, lets move onto my dads family.

My cool and 2nd favorite Uncle. He's so awesome, I've seen him like 3 times but he's beat out all buut one Uncle, he's that cool. He and my dad built his house, obviously years ago, but he had it build on a diagnol almost to the road. Why? Because their was a really pretty tree and if he had it straight, then he would have to cut it down. He's so awesome. At all the funerals I saw him at, he and I always talk. When my Grandpa died, he and I goofed off for like a half and hour. (My grandpas funeral was the most depressing funeral, but the most fun). Then at my Uncles funeral he was hilarious. Well, at the brunch. You cant really goof around at your brothers funeral... So at the brunch.
Anyways, he just got out of the hospital for ammonia. It got to the point where I have 2 new funeral outfits for the wake and the funeral.
It's just, sad. I really want to go spend a weekend up their with him, go fishing, be with him ya know? He's so cool!

My grandma. I have so many stories from my grandma. She's an incredible woman. I love her so freaking much. She's on dialisis. Shes compleatly bruised on both her arms, got multiple surgeries. I really wish I could give her one of my kidneys and let her get off of dialisis. I just, really hate seeing her so fragile.

My dad. He's, well, I don't know what he is exactly, but he's a pretty awesome dad. He got me a Happy Meal from McDonalds!!! I just really wish he could have his old life back before he got hurt. I don't like seeing him having to take all the pills,but I know he needs them. Pills come with age, and yea hes getting old, but it's just, intimadating in a way. I dunno.

And thats all my family issues.

I want to talk about Kevin now. No, nothings wrong with our relationship. I just really love him. Truely down to the pit of my stomache love him. I hope I get to see him tommorow. I really want a hug and cuddles. I'm probably wearing his flannels if I see him tommorow. Why look cute if I'm not going to school... My daily logic is, Why look cute if I'm going to school... Eh. As long as I put on a pair of jeans I'm good. Should I bring Mr. Snuggles again? Nah. I love Mr. Snuggles too :)
Kevin hasnt responded to me for an hour. I suspect HIMYM or AIM isnt working.

I just really love being in a solid relationship for so long. No cheating, no other people, just me and him. I take a lot of comfort in it. I can fully trust him and can just relax. I also love that he wants to be a whore in college so then I'm not like ...other people... who are engaged or am engaged to be engaged at 16. It's rediculous in my eyes. This is the age to explore and have fun, not settle down. Yea, your biological clock is telling you to get married, but its also telling you to get knocked up. I don't know about you, but I am not getting knocked up at 16. It's stupid as all hell to even put your body at risk like that.
If your going to have sex, get your head out of your ass, be a man, put on the condom.

I just really love Kevin.

A lot.
Like a lot a lot.



and Mr. Snuggles.
Mr. Snuggles I wouldnt mindn getting engaged to because hes comfy.
But I couldnt marry him, he doesnt talk enough.
nno offence Mr. Snuggles. ;)



Whats another thing I have on my mind... that isn't gossip.
Oh yea,

Friends

Okay, so I lost a lot of my friends. Well, I lost Sam, Erin, and then founnd out that my aquantences dont like me.

Sam, she got in a group with my aquantences that dont like me, and Erin cant have sleepovers anymore because of medical.

But I still have Andrew, Nicolle, Kevin and now Jen.

Yea, me and Jen are like, really close. I never fully realized that under the sarcasm was a fun girl to hang out with. My moms friends with her mom too so it's really cool. It gets a little awkward at times when she's ranting about Maddie, but I understand the whole, shes my best friend though concept, so those are the times when I sit back smile pretty and nod my head while trying not to burst out laughing at what she did. I dont get full stories becasue she owes that respect to Maddie, which I can understand, but it's like, your respecting maddie by not telling me this, but I'm sure maddie was thinking about respecting you when hooking up with the guy you liked and using "girl code" as a justification method.
Girl Code: The ultimate excuse to get pissed at your friend for no good reason.

Anyways, if I were to imput my oppinion here, it would come back to bite me in the ass, so I'm just going to leave that paragraph how it is in hopes of people not getting pissed at me. which if Maddie is in a pissy mood and is creeping, then message me because I would personally love to get into a bitch fest over this, thus releasing your tension and aggression as to why you are pissy, and letting me freely rant about the subject, feeding off of eachothers agression thus letting it explode into a glorious teenage girl atomic bomb,or the GTHAB. Pronounced Ga Th Aw Ba (in a angry spartan? tone)

Just aim it to be on like a Friday/Saturday night. I'm usually in by 11, but am asleep by 11:30...

Speaking of ginger,
I had my second ginger song sung to me.

First it was, ginger lovin and it feels so good!

now replace Greece's summer lovin, to ginger lovin.
Thank you Adam.


I got Merlin III today!!!
and I also picked out a parakeet I will never buy but totally would because it's pretty, all while knowing I wont because they dont hand feed them at pet smart, and that is why salt hates me and pepper, if he wasnt a crabass, would be a sweet heart.

And this is why Paulie is my favorite.
Oh god, what if he wasnt hand fed.... I would be afraid to sleep because he can open his cage doors, locks and all.
(Thank you Joe for teaching him to be a guard bird)


Paulie is addicted to crackers.
No joke.
Addicted.



Ug. I scratched my eye ball, and am on these anti-biotics now, I can't wear my contact for 3 days so I'm wearing one and am getting a headache.
I'm probably going to borrow my dads eye patch until friday (When I'm off the anti-biotics, hopefully) The scratches didnt compleatly tear, so I'm glad I went in when I did.
Anti-biotics are expensive as bawls.
100 bucks for 20 drops. Yay insurance...

Well I'm gonna go to sleep, I have to sleep in tommorow :)
Yay mom that doesnt make me go to school when I have to much homework to do. YAY!!!
GOOD NIGHT :)